Four Seasons

"Time flows into my heart,
And truthfully,
Our every day is nearer to a memory,
Love and dreams may be things forgotten
one day, but, my wish is to be warmed.
Four seasons with your love,
Within my heart. " - Four Seasons . Namie Amuro

Jealousy

why beat myself up over it?

be thankful & happy.

His TLC (:

(1:27:05 AM): crappp
(1:27:19 AM): i was dancing a little then my foot cracked
(1:30:09 AM): o_o
(1:30:14 AM): is anything hurt?
(1:32:28 AM): just my foot a little
(1:32:58 AM): but i can still walk (:
(1:36:03 AM): aiyah
(1:36:04 AM): noo
(1:36:06 AM): if your foot is hurting
(1:36:10 AM): then it might be your hairline fracture again
(1:36:17 AM): no dancing yet D:
(1:36:20 AM): need like 3 weeks brea
(1:36:23 AM): break
(1:36:25 AM): I MISS IT
(1:36:28 AM): ITS BREAKING MY HEART
(1:36:31 AM): no
(1:36:31 AM): !
(1:36:37 AM): either hold off for 3 weeks
(1:36:38 AM): or
(1:36:39 AM): hurt again
(1:36:43 AM): and hold off for even longer

Babe is right, but I hate him for always getting to me!

Just kiddding ♥ (:

Caitlyn Yaun

Hey cutie how is it up there?

Although I only got the chance to meet you that one night, you are an inspiration to many. Not only that, but when you left, it was a big impact on everyone. Your family misses you dearly. I wish that I got the chance to get to know you, but I'm glad that I got the chance to meet you and celebrate your first birthday after Jamie's debut. I know that you're up there break dancing and laughing because we all know that you're in better hands. You taught many of us that life is too short so we should live it to the fullest. I wish that I was there for your family when you left. And I wish that you're still living your life to the fullest while you're up there watching over your family.

Rest in Peace Baby Caitlyn Yaun
May9,2009 - May20,2010
1 years & 11 days
♥

I have something to say

but I just can't put it down in words.

The Last Song

Choices

They are there to help you choose your path.
There's either one, two, sometimes three or more.
Everyday, you have a choice.
Sometimes mistakes are made, but they are there for you to learn from.
They have both their good and bad.
After one is made, another decision comes along.
One after another and another and another.
It is like a risk.
In the end, you have to ask yourself..
"Is it worth it?"
So what if it was a stupid choice?
So what if you know it won't be worth it?
So what if you just know?
Ask yourself..
What do you want?
No, don't ask others about what to do.
They are just there for advice.
The answer is you.
You have to tell yourself what you want in life.
Life comes and go.
You can't just turn back and fix things because once it happens.
It happens.
Life goes on.
No one is perfect.
Because..

T r u t h is..
everybody is going to hurt you;
you just gotta find the ones worth
s u f f e r i n g for
-Bob Marley

Another Step Towards Independence!

Last night I couldn't sleeep at all =[ I kept flipping back and forth. Getting up to use the bathroom and still I laid there for 3 hours. With that, I only slept for 3 hours last night =/

Surprisingly, I woke up wide awake. Actually, I was wide awake all day. Today I asked daddy if I can drive to school, and he let me! =D

Success! It was the first time I drove without an adult (:

Panarama pictures tomorrow! and here's what I did to the back of my shirt :3

Mommy I Love You! (:

happpy birthday mommmy (:

& today is the 143rd day of the year!
tell someone 'i love you' (:

Nicholas Sparks

"In time, the hurt began to fade and it was easier to just let it go. At least I thought it was. But in every boy I met in the next few years, I found myself looking for you, and when the feelings got too strong, I'd write you another letter. But I never sent them for fear of what I might find. By then, you'd gone on with your life and I didn't want to think about you loving someone else. I wanted to remember us like we were that summer. I didn't ever want to lose that."
— The Notebook

"I fell in love with her when we were together, then fell deeper in love with her in the years we were apart."
— Dear John

"The saddest people I've ever met in life are the ones who don't care deeply about anything at all. Passion and satisfaction go hand in hand, and without them, any happiness is only temporary, because there's nothing to make it last."
— Dear John

"I'd learned that some things are best kept secret."
— Dear John

"Silence is pure. Silense is holly. It draws people together because only those who are comfortable with each other can sit without speaking"
— The Notebook

"Women want the fairytale. Not all women, of course, but most women grow up dreaming about the kind of man who would risk everything for them, even knowing they might get hurt."
— True Believer

"Life, I've learned, is never fair. If people teach anything in school, that should be it."
— A Walk to Remember

"My dad always said that when you're struggling with something, look at all the people around you and realize that every single person you see is struggling with something, and to them, it's just hard as what you're going through"
— Dear John

"Sometimes you have to be apart from the people you love, but that doesn't make you love them any less. Sometimes it makes you love them more."
— The Last Song

"Poetry wasn't written to be analyzed; it was meant to inspire without reason, to touch without understanding."
— The Notebook

"You always have a choice. It's just that some people make the wrong one."
— The Guardian

"While I sleep, I dream of you, and when I wake, I long to hold you in my arms. If anything, our time apart has only made me more certain that I want to spend my nights by your side, and my days with your heart."
— Nights in Rodanthe

"You can't live your life for other people. You've got to do what's right for you, even if it hurts some people you love."
— The Notebook

"When people cared about each other, they always found a way to make it work."
— True Believer

I is a cheese ball.

Magnet Banquet

[update later]

J.Reyez - That's Okay With Me

now you're a song I love to sing. never thought I'd feel so free. now I know what's been to me and that's okay with me

Shin Splint

So I finally went to see the doctor about my left leg and it turned out that the inner part of my leg, my tibial bone started cracking a bit. But it's the width of a hair strand so I'll be ok (: I just need to stay off of it for a week and NOT DANCE or do anything physical. T.T

What are shin splints?
Shin splints are injuries to the front of the outer leg. While the exact injury is not known, shin splints seem to result from inflammation from injury to the tendon (posterior peroneal tendon) and adjacent tissues in the front of the outer leg.

Shin splints represent one member of a group of injuries called "overuse injuries." Shin splints occur most commonly in runners or aggressive walkers.

lately

I've been feeling rather hurt, upset, and angry
& I don't know why
but I feel like I need to cry

the little things

(12:20:29 AM): babe are you staying up tonight?
(12:20:40 AM): not too late
(12:20:40 AM): :>
(12:20:41 AM): i promise

even the little promises I know I can believe without a doubt (: ♥

I feel like blogging

but I have nothing to blog about.

APEX & Date Night

Yesterday was the annual APEX Youth Olympics! This year it was held at the Police Academy in Elysian Park. It was smaller but it still worked out!

My morning started off with mommy still sleeping so I ended up taking the bus. The dash didn't come so I took the bus back to my house and ended up walking. It was a nice walk but it was too early in the morning for me T.T I wasn't use to waking up early to take a walk or jog anymore.

I ended up getting there before YUCA so I just sat around and waited. The staff there thought that I was a lost little girl T.T YUCA finally arrived and I had to wait with Dennis for everyone else to come. When we got to registration, they told us to pair up so I paired up with Ellen. They put up in team 12 with Andy, Richard, Eva, Hok, Gibson, and Rito and our team leaders were Angel and Clifford! Our first game was the obstacle course. We placed 2nd in the round. After that it was tug-o-war! OMG THE MOST EPIC COMEBACK! During our first game, we ended up falling and tumbling all over each other! But we held onto the rope and we pulled with all our might! BAM! We won! I think we played like 5-7 rounds of tug-o-war and we won every game! Undefeated tug-o-war champs! After that it was the trust walk. Team work! We were like 2 minutes ahead of everyone! Bwahaha! But we had to sit around for another 45 minutes before lunch. NUUUUHHHHH

For our lunch entertainment, Thomas' Apartment played and Michelle Andria [same girl from last year] sang. We had panda express for lunch! So much better this year! Except that they didn't have boba this time :[ I've been craving boba so badly too. Wahh when Shaolin Warriors were performing, the little boys were so cute! I want my kid to do it now! I didn't get to watch the whole thing cause Dennis pulled me aside so that they can interview me. He introduced me to a lady named Apple. What a cute name right!? Oh the way, Apple and I were singing and dancing to 'Killing me Softly' ! During the interview, they just asked me questions like 'What made you want to come back to APEX? During your last year's experience, did it effect you in anyway? What do you like bout APEX?' etc.

Time for the afternoon activities! We started off with the sponge race! Rawrs we placed 2nd for both games! I'm sorry I don't have a game face Angel! Hah he was yelling at me to don't smile cause that's not a game face! :P After this game, it was time for dodgeball! We won the first and last game! So dangerous! We played one more game just for fun and I got owned! Wham! The ball hit me right in the face! Apparently the other team leader was aiming for my team leader but it hit me instead! LOL It's all good! Took a shot for my leader! I still went back in to play anyways! Yes I am a trooper! :D Onwards to our last game! It was the relay race! This event went by fast, I really wasn't sure when we started and when we didn't. I just went at it haha. Since this was our last event, we just sat around and waited for the award ceremony. We ended up tieing with team 6 I think.. The only way to determine it was who has the best cheer. They so copied us! But it's all good. At least we placed (: Angel couldn't decided on who was MVP so we all played rock paper scissors for it! and I got it! Bwahah! Such a cute panda :3 After the whole event, I walked home, and one of those annoying little bugs flew into my nose T.T i had to suffer with it till I got home.

I realized that Andy still ahd my notebook and book, so he asked if I wanted to grab dinner at Old Town. Atfirst I was like 'WTF? YOUR BACK!' But he said that he could manage it sooo I got ready and headed out. I swear buses and train was hella lagging today! I thought that Andy was hiding in the train again but this time he got there before me. Rawrs! The plan was to eat at Islands, but we ended up watching Date Night. ZIP YOUR VAGINA! The Arclight theaters was nice! But so expensive! After we were going to eat at Islands, but thinking bout the time, we decided to go eat at Chinatown but ended up hanging out at the park. THEN going back to Chinatown bout 11. Went to go buy dinner, then his mommy came to pick us up. Got home near 12 ._.

I'm pretty glad that I told my parents bout Andy, cause now I don't really have to hide anything from them. I like going out at night with Andy cause everything is so pretty and more fun then the day time! At least AP's are out of the way so now we have more time(:

Last night I had the weirdest dream ever. Instead of you leaving LA, it was me but here's the twist, it wasn't just LA I was leaving, I was leaving the country, FOR KOREA?! WTF AM I DOING IN KOREA?! And before I left, I just slipped out the 3 words for first time and it was like nothing with no hesitation. Then I woke up. I fell back asleep and the dream continued except it was like years later and things were still the same. Maybe that's telling me to stop worrying so much.

Time flies by quickly. Time is precious. You can't predict what will happen later. Time is in the present. (:

Econ Micro and Macro Exam!

Today!

For Macro, I felt like I did good on the free response but not the multiple choice.

For Micro I felt like I did good on the multiple choice but not the free response.

yeahhh! ap's are over!

3 months(:

Today marks 3 months that I've been with Andy (:

Everything is going very well. From months of chasing and playing to that one week to where we are today. From being so mean to each other to being the biggest cheese balls ever. Three months is short, but it feels longer then that. I'm happy to wake up every morning to your wake up calls because it gives me a good start of a brand new day. I dislike waking up and dragging myself to school every morning, but if I don't I don't get to see you and that's a poopie. I'm having really bad seniorities but you're still pushing me to keep trying. Not once did you ever treated me wrong or say the wrong things at the wrong time. Not once have we ever fought over stupid little things or anything at all besides for who pays for who. Not once have I ever denied the fact that you're my boyfriend. And not once have I never thought about all the good times we shared. You're the first guy that I had the guts to tell my parents about and the first guy who accepts me at my flaws and never thinks any different of me. The one guy who would rush to me when I didn't get the text bout the day being canceled. The one guy who makes sure I'm getting sleep and keeping me on track. The one guy who believes that I can do it. The one guy who thinks I'm a totally weirdo and acts stupid with me. The guy who wants me to have fun even though I spend more time with my friends more then I do with him. The guy who would take stupid pictures with me. The guy who won't text me at work because he knows I'm not suppose to. The guy who would walk around a park and push me on the swing in the middle of the night. The guy who is willing to spend so much money just because it was prom night and still go out at night even though he was really tired. The guy who I can talk to bout anything and be able to trust him about it. The guy who will still call me cute or beautiful even though I look like shit. The guy who wastes his valuable time on a girl like me. This guy is my boyfriend ♥

Jamie's Debut

PROM 2O1O

(3:52:33 AM): but she was extra beautiful today

Wahh time was passing by so slow at school today! We weren't allowed to leave school till after 4th period. What a pain in the butt. Hah don't you just love how we all just happen to have "doctors appointment" at the same day? xD

Yay! When Maggie and I got to her house, her parents came home so we were able to get a ride to Chinatown! Damnn they made me have so much hair that I never knew I had! It was quick too and the lady who did our hair was really cute. Every time she did something, she would say things like "Oh so prettty! So Cute! etc." Quynh came to pick us up and then we went to get Sophia. We got a little lost but we found our way! Once we got to Jia Ying's grandma's house, SHE WASN'T EVEN READY! SHE WAS BARLEY STARTING ON HER HAIR! LAG! So then Quynh started on our make-up. It wasn't until 3:30 that she was finally done! Lien was already at my house. Damnn she literally brought a box of make-up! I really loved how Quynh did my make-up! By the time we finished, it was about 5ish already and Yong still wasn't here! Andy came and then we just sat around and waited for Yong. Finally he came and changed and we left the house around 6.
Thank goodness for gift cards! We had to rush with the pictures because we were on a time limit. While waiting, Gina said that she was going to come visit so I asked if she can buy some Cha for Tea [thinking she was there but she ended up going to Lollicup T.T] So she didn't make it to us in time :/ Arg WHY DO YOU HAVE TO MAKE THINGS SO COMPLICATED EVEN MORE?! THE WHOLE WORLD DOESN'T FUCKEN REVOLVE AROUND YOU! During the car ride back, my dad was nagging at me. Being that I was already pissed off, he irritated me more. Once we got to prom I just walked straight into the bathroom to fix my make-up.Aww everyone looked so pretty! Maggie and I were dying to see the guys all dressed up cause its RARE that they do! The food was delicious! And we were the first table on the dance floor! Oh man I loved the dancing! Except at one point they played too much mexican music so during that time Andy and I went to play with the photobooth! Yay Fransisco won Prom King! I would have to say that my favorite moment of the night was slow dancing with Andy (:
Bowling was fun too! Freaken Andrew and his bowling skills! Left Action Lanes bout 3am. Dropped off Maggie & Andy then I told daddy bout Andy

Me: Hey daddy
Dad: Yeah?
Me: So that guy Andy.. he's my boyfriend
Dad: He's YOUR boyfriend? Hah It's ok just don't let it mess with your life.
-- LOL THANKS FOR LAUGHING AT ME DAD

Above all, I wish Prom didn't end so fast, because time is precious and my night was definitely memorable.

the two songs we danced to:
forever young + i'm yours = forever I'm yours ♥

"today was a fairytale I wore a dress you wore a dark gray t-shirt you told me I was pretty when I looked like a mess today was a fairytale" ;; Taylor Swift

I like cheesy(:

(8:28:52 PM): how do your nails look
(8:28:52 PM): hmm
(8:28:58 PM): LIKE CRAP
(8:31:09 PM): D:
(8:31:29 PM): i bet i'll still hold your hands though
(8:31:30 PM): :>

♥ (:

AND PROM IS TOMORRRRROW! :D

When Five Fell

http://wongfuproductions.com/2010/05/new-short-released-when-five-fell-wes/

The Objects

Can the things we love, love us back just the same?

Glasses (David Choi – davidchoimusic.com) – The glasses represent sight. In a relationship, there are times when our one desire is to share with the other person. We hope to offer a new perspective. To learn and grow from each other in that way. To show the world. Unfortunately, nothing stays clear forever. Many things can blind us: jealousy, doubt, overthinking, and ironically, comfort.

Telephone (Bobby Choy – bigphonymusic.com) – The phone represents hearing. Relationships can’t exist without listening and communication. Sometimes, circumstances prevent people from communicating face to face. That distance greatly effects them. We hear about experiences when what we really want is to live them. Words can only go so far. The phone is interesting because it is constantly eavesdropping on our talks. What would that feel like? To always be talked to but never the subject of conversation. It must hurt to be so unknowingly ignored.

Umbrella (AJ Rafael – myspace.com/ajrafael) – The umbrella represents touch. The very simple idea of being close enough to touch someone. Physical contact. To be able to hold, cover, protect. These are basic parts of a relationship we hope to fulfill. Essentially an umbrella reflects occasional necessity. But who would want that? To feel needed when it’s only convenient.

Scarf (Paul Dateh – pauldateh.com) – The scarf represents smell. The intimacy of knowing someones scent is very special. It’s a privelege that isn’t easily shared and is often overlooked. It may sound ridiculous, but who are the people you can identifty with smell? Most likely those that you are very close with. People you have known for more than awhile. Also, scents can fade. Physical contact carries and transfers a scent but when that contact disappears, the scent is no longer.

Cup (Chris Dinh) – The cup represents taste. More specifically, the cup represents a kiss. And a kiss is the most universal symbol of love and affection. The fact that it describes a first kiss is even more significant. A first kiss is innocent and naive. We cherish it as though it will last forever. But when the cup is broken, the kiss is no longer possible– just like a relationship.

A pair of glasses that goes blind. A phone that resorts to eavesdropping. An umbrella that longs to be held. A scarf that treasures scent. A cup that wants to be kissed. These are the ways I tried to personify the objects to show they fell in and out of love. Between the five, viewers should be able to relate to different dimensions and roles of a relationship. Whether it’s budding in the early stages, the challenge of long distance, slowly fading feelings, or losing out to someone else. Even the order of the objects in the short show a progression in the relationship. Starting from looking and eventually moving onto touching.

Study study study

Econ, you may be sexy with your models and curves, but sometimes, I get sick of studying you!
One more week till exam!

Prom in 2 days! I'm reallly excited! Come on week! Why are you passing by so slow?!
Dear Thursday, please pass by fast


I like this mix better then the first one (:

The way you are now since you got with him, you've been a bigger pain in the ass. I'm starting to not want to be around you anymore nor do I want to be there to help you or putt up with your negatives.

Grow fucken up already. You don't need to cause a big scene or act like you're the fucken shit cause you're not.

I'm just glad I can open up to you bout anything and you still won't think differently of me ♥

Time is Precious

I have been blogging but keeping them private and talking to myself. I will blog tomorrow. For now, I'm really digging this video.